Change Your Experience Of Loss
Divorce or Grief from the loss of a loved one can be devastating events in people's lives, even if it is one that turns out okay in the longer run, just getting through it can be harrowing for many, and just very challenging for the rest of us. There are times of anger, loneliness, denial, and of course just plain grief, which sometimes seem unbearable. As human beings we have feelings, thoughts, behaviors, and our physical reactions. Temporary reactions to stress that linger more than a couple of weeks can easily turn into a real clinical depression, or significant withdrawal from others who may not know how to help us. That is where an experienced psychologist who has been through many of these issues both personally and professionally can sometimes be more helpful than family and friends, who we are sometimes afraid of wearing out!
How can talking help?
Talking by itself is NOT what usually helps, but when the talking leads to changes in behaviors and thoughts, then feelings can follow. Although habitual feelings and thoughts may have taken years to develop, they do not take as long to change. A lot of change can occur in the first couple of months. With the loss of a loved one you instantly lose the past, present and future, as it becomes painful to think about a past which is no longer a possibility in the present or the future. I work with people to keep their time horizons relatively short until they get back on their feet and can imagine a new future, which can be an exciting and happy one!